„We accept the love we think we deserve”
Or we don’t. ‘Cause we don’t know what we deserve, we don’t know when we deserve better or a person is just to good for us.
Or you’re like me. You wake up and think ” I can’t face it anymore.”
You end your day like me: „I could do better!”
I feel like this will be my life…and I’m so scared and I hope it will get better, but it doesn’t. When I’m alone, my own feelings hurt me, and that’s not ok. I’m scared because I just want to be selfish, and confident and less shy. I want to be that kind of person that looks so good and gives the impression of confidence all the time. I want to make sure I don’t need anything and anyone to be happy, but I just can’t.
And you know why?
Because, ‘till now, everything was alright if I was alone. But then, I reached that age… when I understood I need people around me. I need someone I can base on and someone to hold my hand, someone to hug me when I need support. So it’s not fine anymore. Beeing alone is not something good anymore, and that scares me ‘cause I wish it was. I wish I would feel good with myself, I wish it would be normal to be alone. But it’s not, because when I’m alone, I think…and this kills me because I think about all my mystakes and all the things I never wanted to happen…
I wish I would be strong enough to let past go and smile to the future.